Midnight Mania

I seem to be on a roll right nowadays. I mean what could explain the need to use my laptop for writing out my thoughts this frequently. Well I am so deal with it. What got me in the mood right now is the amazing music of Abida Parveen. To all those who are not aware of this amazing woman, should instantly Google her. You might be able to find translations of her work and music with subtitles in your language with them. So please do look. Her music basically falls under the category of Sufi music. Her music is beautiful. The words are what should be heard and understood.

Once again I apologize for my ramblings and ranting. I am in no way paying heed to the fact that my grammar is shit and what I’m writing might not even be good. I just want to get this out there as soon as possible. The thought of appealing to the masses has lost its appeal in the regent months. Why should I look for the approval of people who only care about bringing me down? I am under no obligation to do something like that. All I care about now is picking up the pieces that I have been left with. It’s difficult but it can be done. I have so many people who are with me.

I don’t get one thing with people, why are they there when you might not need them, but are not completely gone when you need them. This is another question to ponder over. Well, my invisible readers, I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for actually showing interest in the work that I have been putting out here.

Alright this post was just interrupted by a convo with a friend…….

So yes, I just got told a hilarious story about a guy and his friend’s thing. It was extremely illuminating. But let’s not get stuck on it, shall we. So I was telling you all about how I’m trying to get to a happy place. I have relapses. But I do manage to pull through them. Like right now, I had this small window of sorrow. The sorrow I tell is like a blast. It kind of knocks the breath out of me. It leaves me panting and crying. Sometimes, I think that it’s better like this. I like to remember, I wouldn’t want the memories of the best time of my life to fade away.

But the catch 22 is that they come with a lot of pain. The pain doesn’t go away. I will have to eventually get over the pain. People do try to make me feel good, but no one can take anyone else’s place. So I am trying the best I can. Someone once asked me why I become a sad crying soul when I write my blog. My answer was I don’t have to pretend when I’m writing my blog. No one is telling me I’m being stupid. No one is urging me to go in another direction. Most of all no one is telling me that all the time I spent being happy was shit.

Enough for today people, I’ll catch with all of you later.