The Would-Be Writer

All I want to do is scream right now. Scream till my voice dies away slowly. It should just die down. So that I have no voice to talk with. Probably that will give me a chance to keep quite. It will give me an excuse to keep quite. It would give my pain a chance to die down. The inside of my throat itches. From all the things I want to say to you. From all the stories that I want to share with you. The missed conversations are all dissolving slowly inside of me. My words, the world I built is slowly dissolving inside of me. I don’t think I will ever get a chance to say these things to you. But this hurt is different. I feel empty, barren like there is nothing for me to do. My mere existence has been brought to a standstill. What exactly is it that I was doing at the same time last weekend? I was thinking up of ways to make you laugh. I was thinking up of stories that I would tell you. And when all of that was over, I was thinking of how comforting the sound of your voice is. I...

You know what happens when there is fear in your brain…. Your fight or flight reaction stimulus is activated. We have heard this, over the years again and again and again. But do you recognize it when it is happening? Honestly though tell me, do you? What happens first, when you fear something is you become extremely susceptible to overthinking. Your brain automatically makes up scenarios of the worst possible thing that could happen. These scenarios then become extremely large in your brain. It makes your brain hurt. Next comes the paranoia. This paranoia makes it difficult for you to think straight. Anything which can be said to you is not looked at rationally. You become irrational and everything happening is treated with the same thought. Irrationally: the world is out to get me sort of thoughts start popping into your head. Then comes the decision making time. This is when you have to take either a fight action or a flight action. This is to my readers, think for a second...